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| name: | fuckwit |
| age: | 3 |
| lives: | london |
| works: | london |
| into: | keira |
| booze: | yes |
| fags: | no |
| listens to: | |
| watches: | telly |
| reads: | |
| hero: | Malcolm off Thick of It |
| cunt: | you're the cunt, mate |
| bribe me with: | money |
| ashamed of: | liking keira knightley |
| could live without: | |
| sobs at: | keira |
| gets hard/wide to: | keira |
| regrets: | |
| wants: | keira |