WHO: Pete Doherty aka Peter Doherty WHEN: 12 March, 1979 WHERE: Hexham, Northumberland, UK WHAT: A parody of rock and roll debauchery HEIGHT: 6 ft 2 in KNOWN FOR: Taking drugs, failing to stop taking drugs, inexplicably managing to shag Kate Moss.

Convicted burglar, drug monkey and all round oxygen thief, Pete Doherty can be found, when not found slumped in a gutter, shovelling up all and any drugs going, hanging off the arm of Kate Moss or attempting the extricate the NME from his arse, performing his risible songs and poetry to an audience of fawning morons.

A puffy-faced, lanky buffoon of a man, Doherty first came to prominence with The Libertines, a band so indescribably awful that they resorted to playing ‘guerilla gigs’ (ie busking) and in each others flats. Despite this they achieved something of a following and the unfettered adoration of indie music rag the NME, which remains to this day undecided as to whether Doherty is the coolest or least cool man in rock, as if such a thing were important.
Doherty wilfully destroyed The Libs, as twats are wont to call them, by burgling his band mate’s flat (for which he spent his first few months in chokey) and being far more interested in cocaine, crack and heroin that doing the things bands are supposed to, like rehearsing, writing songs and turning up for gigs.

Following a period of one-off collaborations, including the hit single For Lovers, which Doherty and ludicrously named partner Wolfman, with typical junkie logic, sold the publishing rights to in a pub, he formed new band Babyshambles.
Having already set the pattern, Babyshambles continues to this day, plagued by Doherty’s erratic, drug-driven behaviour, shedding members, bookings and tours like a leper sheds body parts.

Doherty has made numerous half-arsed attempts to quit drugs including one, paid for but none other that EastEnders’ own Dot Cotton, that required him to be beaten by Thai monks with bamboo poles. Sadly the monks didn’t beat him hard enough and he promptly returned to the UK and a big bag of rocks.

The British judicial system seems to be just as in awe of Doherty as both the press and fashion industry. Frequent appearances in court and broken promises to get off crack, smack and the rest do little to encourage the country’s magistrates to send him back to prison, where he belongs.

For all his attempts to be taken seriously as a musician and poet, the tragic irony is that Doherty is best known for throwing his smack diminished sausage up model Kate Moss’ much-visited mimsy. Their on-off, on-off, does-anybody-give-a-toss relationship is regularly catalogued by the media, which, as all involved in the Doherty business must be, is desperately waiting for him to overdose properly so they can all turn him into the kind of ridiculous money-spinning martyr to rock that Kurt Cobain, another whinger, has become.

PETE DOHERTY VIDEO:

shooting up and talking to Kate


flicking blood at MTV