Back through the mists of time when Tom Cruise was a big film star and Nicole Kidman could pick a decent script, the two stars adopted some children. Since the divorce the children, called Bella and Connor, have lived with Tom and not seen that much of Nicole as she's travelled the world making cack films and getting knocked up by a country singer called Urban. Worse, the kids call Katie Holmes 'Mum', which must be confusing as Holmes can only be about a year older than they are.

Mel B's husband gives her a slap and gets a fleshy ripple. Top marks for the shadow in this picture too. TMZ

German newspaper claims that Amy Winehouse doesn't leave home without a nappy. WWTDD

Pete Wentz looking like more of a twat than usual. Dlisted

Guess who's a big fan of Lindsay Lohan's music? Celebwarship

Alanis Morissette is honestly not bothered about her ex getting engaged to Scar-Jo. Honestly. Mollygood

Ben and Jerry produce the not at all tacky 'John Lennon' ice cream at last. ICYDK

Pink speaks up for Australian sheep. Plenty of time on her hands then? Hollyscoop

Colin Farrell looking like a greasy, thin tramp. Hopefully it's for a movie role. Laineygossip

Katie Holmes is relaxed, happy and beautiful. And yes, Tom Cruise is 5000 miles away from her. ASL

Matthew McConaughey's brother 'Rooster' is in a reality show. And he named his son 'Miller Lite'. Clearly a great man. Justjared

Will Smith. He's not involved with Scientology (he claims) despite the best efforts of uber-recruiter Tom Cruise flashing his dazzling smile towards Smith and demanding that he looks into his eyes (not around the eyes, etc). Some of the crew on Will's latest film, 'Hancock', were surprised by the wrap presents that Wicky-Wicky-Wa-Wa dispensed at the end of filming.

Katie Holmes has confirmed that she will move to New York soon in order to make her debut on Broadway in the play 'All My Sons'. As yet there is no news as to whether Tom Cruise will accompany her (it's not like he's awfully busy in Hollywood these days) or merely monitor her progress from his luxury suite currently orbiting three miles above the earth.

Lindsay Lohan relaxes by strolling through weeds in a bikini. TMZ

Scarlett Johansson singing live, though 'singing' might be stretching it a bit. WWTDD

Classy Lily Allen is sick of flashing her boobs, so now here's her undergrowth. Dlisted

Colin Farrell taking method acting a bit far. Celebwarship

Hot, hot news on Suri Cruise. Mollygood

Nicole Kidman is having his child and Keith Urban is still the dullest man on the planet. ICYDK

Ellen DeGeneres' wedding is going to be a tacky affair if Timberlake has his way. Hollyscoop

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz had an 'Alice In Wonderland' wedding theme. Cheery. INO

Brad Pitt's family tattoo explained at last. Defamer

Teeeny tiny Tom Cruise is planning his next disastrous movie role and fancies playing the President of the USA of Earth, in the movie '28th Amendment'. Maybe he's blurring art and reality but someone should point out to him that pretending to be the President doesn't mean that they'll let you play on that UFO in Roswell.

Someone kicked the shit out of Suge Knight. Twelve million suspects to be interviewed. TMZ

Mischa Barton reckons she hasn't got cottage cheese thighs. WWTDD

Tom Cruise and family enjoying some 'Earth Soccerball'. Dlisted

Proof that Dina Lohan is more than deserving of her 'Mother of the Year' award. ASL

Britney, is that you? Celebwarship

Justin Timberlake sells out. Laineygossip

Amy Winehouse looks like an malnourished child with lots of tattoos. SeriouslyOMG

Paris Hilton has a little bit of 'Single White Female' about her. INO

If this painful 1 minute and 53 second clip doesn't make you gag, we don't know what will. Here's Victoria and David Beckham attempting humour on Oprah Winfrey by explaining their favourite Tom Cruise films to celebrate his 25 years in the business.

Could David Beckham actually be charisma personified?



And if that's not enough for you after the jump there are some pictures of the couple at the Metropolitan Museum of Art gala thing the other night along with Tom and Katie, an old looking Olsen twin and Janet Jackson, who seems to be missing a neck.

To celebrate 25 years as a successful artist (well, he nearly made it, just falling at the last hurdle) Tom Cruise has finally launched his own official website and guess what? There's no mention of a certain religion that he's rather involved with.