Jude Law, spreading joy around the world as usual, but this time looking like a depressed Travis Bickle. ASL

Britney Spears' boots defy the laws of physics. How do they work? Dlisted

Those classy pictures of the Spears baby shower. Like C&A never ceased trading. Celebwarship

Mariah Carey's wedding pictures. This is the real bride and groom, despite looking like the plastic models atop the cake. Mollygood

The Pete Doherty welfare fund was nearly up to £20 when the popular man was released from custody. Contactmusic

Miley Cyrus has ruined her TV career. ICYDK

Kelly Osbourne's PA gets just a little too personal. With her tit. TMZ

Robert Downey Jr looking as amazed as anyone that 'Iron Man' is a success. LaineyGossip

Katie Holmes levitates while Stella McCartney goes all 'Stepford'. CDL

Matt 'Di-Do-Diddly' Damon turns into Ned Flanders. Justjared

If this painful 1 minute and 53 second clip doesn't make you gag, we don't know what will. Here's Victoria and David Beckham attempting humour on Oprah Winfrey by explaining their favourite Tom Cruise films to celebrate his 25 years in the business.

Could David Beckham actually be charisma personified?



And if that's not enough for you after the jump there are some pictures of the couple at the Metropolitan Museum of Art gala thing the other night along with Tom and Katie, an old looking Olsen twin and Janet Jackson, who seems to be missing a neck.

This is how Homer Simpson would look if he were a real human. Like a cartoon with no eyelids, then. Mollygood

Like father like son. Brooklyn and Romeo Beckham are delighted by a massive set of basketball tits. TMZ

Emma Watson forgot her 'Trim-alcio' spell. WWTDD

Carmen Electra turns 36, and doesn't she look delighted? Hollywoodrag

Scientology exposed. The full exposé of former member Jason Beghe, but under a very unfortunate title. Xenutv

Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson are still 'friendly'. Celebwarship

PETA using dumb animals to promote their cause again. Mollygood

Tom Cruise attempting to scale the upper slopes of Katie Holmes. SeriouslyOMG

Paris Hilton would like a double (shotgun) wedding. Defamer

Samuel L Jackson tries to steal someone else's car. TMZ

Susan Sarandon and the Mitchell brothers out and about in New York. WWTDD

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes battle for custody of their robotic baby. Dlisted

David Hasselhoff back in the dating game and smooth as ever. NYDailynews

Marilyn Manson's girlfriend looks like… him, really. Celebwarship

Surely Jesus has better things to do with his time than this? Mollygood

Tom Hanks wants even more money. ICYDK

Kate Hudson believes the paparazzi will get bitten in their arses by a car mechanic, or something. Hollyscoop

'Tight at the back,' thinks David Beckham, missing the two big target men up front. Celebslam

Some idiot gave Tori Spelling another job. Will they ever learn? Popbytes

How much did your favourite US star earn last year? Too much, that's how much. WWTDD

Amy Winehouse – addicted to ironing and now her hair fills an alcove. Dlisted

Vanilla Ice should face a prison term for this haircut. Celebwarship

Nelson Mandela is seriously considering going back to Riker's Island prison. Mollygood

When the biggest nutter on the planet avoids you it's time to give up. Hollyscoop

Wherever deodorant and rap meet, Janet Jackson will be in the middle. ASL

Cameron Diaz is prepared to stare at beavers and wrestle a tickly trout. CDL

Star magazine is claiming that Katie Holmes is finding life with Tom Cruise increasingly difficult. What could be hard about living with a power-crazed madman who is second in command of his own religion? Tsk! These earth women are so weak. Poor human Katie is reportedly suffering from headaches and dizzy spells, so perhaps she has been forced to watch some of Tom's recent films.

Katie Holmes seems to have adopted a ‘If you can’t escape from them, join them’ attitude and is reportedly broody for another child with husband Tom Cruise. ‘Now’ magazine report that this will mean some form of IVF treatment, which Tom has ruled out immediately as it doesn’t sit well with his Scientology religion and it’s well-thought through tenets and beliefs.

Katie Holmes is once again professing her love for earth husband Tom Cruise, and though she's stopped short of jumping on sofas and shouting "Yeah!Yeah! I'm in love!" she's not far off. She seems to believe that if she repeats it enough then people will actually begin to believe they have a loving relationship rather than a jailer/captor one. To this end, she asked permission from Tom then trotted off with several bodyguards to be interviewed by InStyle magazine.