Jerry Lewis fails to raise a smile with airport security by having a handgun in his luggage. TMZ

Are the stars of 'Gossip Girl' gay? Well, do they look gay to you? WWTDD

What? Pamela Anderson was the first choice to play Scully in 'The X-Files'? Hollywoodrag

Dan Quayle to appear on 'Dancing With The Stars'. He does a mean tango. Dlisted

Kelsey Grammar is Bedside-show Bob again after another health scare. Contactmusic

Another Hollywood couple having twins and denying IVF treatment. Celebwarship

Paris Hilton and her boyfriend are still dressing like idiots, though not as bad as Britney and Justin. Mollygood

Matalan let their standards slip with new bedding range by Katie Price. ICYDK

Madonna isn't ill, it's just a bad photo that makes her look like Tutankhamen's older sister. Hollyscoop

Cate Blanchett proves that having children is the best thing in the world. Laineygossip

Poor Jordan was shunned at the Cartier International Polo match yesterday and was refused entry in the VIP area. Officials were reportedly determined to keep her away from Prince Charles so she was unfortunately unable to mingle with 'real' celebs like, er, Caprice, Lady Victoria Hervey, Kelly Brook, Rebecca Loos (or was it a Bulgarian weightlifter in disguise?) and Tina Hobley.

America realises David Beckham is boring. About time. TMZ

Sienna Miller getting her grubby little tits rubbed by someone else's husband. WWTDD

Six arrests in three months. Rapper DMX is obsessed by the back seat of police cars. Dlisted

Ricky Gervais. Fat smug man is happy about being fat and smug. Contactmusic

Kate Moss doesn't care about money, as long as she can buy any house she wants. Celebwarship

Britney Spears is already shaping up to be a great auntie. Mollygood

Jordan looking more like a Madame Tussaud's model than a human. ICYDK

Britney gets a little bit of freedom. Though she may be in handcuffs here. Hollyscoop

The crazy, mixed-up world of the Beckhams. Laineygossip

Brooke Sheilds looking like a fly. Yeeeah

It's a travesty against music. More than 40,000 copies of Peter Andre and Jordan's album 'A Whole New World' were actually made. And now they've been found dumped in a storeroom, rotting and covered in bird poo. But let's face it, we'd rather have a load of rotting bird poo than a single copy of their CD.

Jordan's son Harvey makes his feelings clear. Dlisted

Jennifer Lopez appears to be sucking the life out of her skeletal husband. Celebwarship

George Clooney got over his recent love split by dating another woman. Weeks before the break-up. Hollyscoop

Kid Rock calls off concert because of diarrhoea. Rock 'n' roll! TMZ

Despite once dating Madonna, Warren Beatty is a big old softy. Laineygossip

Lindsay Lohan pretending to be pregnant on set. Sam Ronson 'puzzled'. ASL

Jessica Simpson confident about her sexuality. CDL

Mini-Me is a hit with the full-sized ladies. Splash

Sarah Jessica Parker doesn't need 'Anything But You'. Apart from a gag and a bag on her head.

Can the UK really get any worse: first our economy is in tatters, second we've got worse civil liberties legislation than China and now news reaches us that our Olympic team for 2012 could have Jordan in it. Yes, the glamour model is serious about dressage and made her competitive debut recently, finishing sixth out of a field of 27.

Peter Andre has been named 'Daddy Of the Year 2008' as sponsored by the less famous alternative to HP sauce, Daddies and voted for by the British public. Unfortunately Dwight York was unable to make it to accept the booby prize.

Jordan has just announced that she loves nothing more of an evening than to get into bed and have a good old read. Yes. She can read. And proper books too, but only if they are about serial killers. In particular, Fred and Rosemary West, so if Peter were to go missing perhaps it would be safe to check under the patio first.

First of all, let us give a great big Holy Moly Happy Birthday to Jordan, who turned 30 today. Who'd have thought she was still that young! And as she's such a sprightly young thing, Katie still harbours some girlish fantasies – namely to become an Olympic horse rider. Although maybe someone should explain to her that she can't do it the same way she became a best-selling author – ie getting someone else to do it and simply putting her name on it...

Janet Jackson attempts to look like a perfume bottle and succeeds. Sorry, Miss Jackson. TMZ

This is either Lily Allen or Jade Goody topless. WWTDD

Christina Aguilera looking like Penelope Pitstop crossed with Jordan. Dlisted

Rumer Willis's unusual face may be launching a singing career, just like daddy. ASL

Chloe Sevigny not looking so great in glasses. Websterismybitch

Ryan Adams offering to show Mandy Moore his 'Heartbreaker'. Celebwarship

Doherty and Winehouse in 'Dawn of the Deadbeats'. Mollygood

Mariah Carey's new name simply isn't cricket. ICYDK

Jennifer Aniston may be in love with John Mayer. The world rejoices. Laineygossip

Steve-O giggles but his bail bondsman might have known cameras would be present, judging by his t-shirt. Bauergriffinonline

Claudia Schiffer tries to look sexy by wearing only panties and a mask. Oh, it worked! CDL