Amy Winehouse was due to play a concert in Paris on Friday night (the aptly named 'Rock En Seine'). Well, you can guess the rest, can't you?

Not content with opening his mouth on cue like a performing dog and vomiting his thoughts into the ears of the awaiting media whenever his daughter so much as sneezes, Mitch Winehouse has decided to broaden his showbiz portfolio by branching out into movies.

On her first night out after a spell in hospital you'd think Amy Winehouse would take it easy. She only had to show her face at a fundraising event for the Hawley Arms (presumably to raise cash for the heroes who burnt it down), keep the booze to a minimum and head home. Did she do that? No, no no etc.

If you were Amy Winehouse and you wanted to escape the vampire-like druggies of North London, you'd pick a nice relaxing retreat in some salubrious country pile wouldn't you? Not if you're Amy though, she is apparently recovering in a place that local estate agents are describing as a "hell hole". And not only this, apparently the last tenant died. Is she just staying at Pete Doherty's and no one's noticed that he no longer has a pulse?

Still no parole for the man who shot John Lennon but missed Yoko. TMZ

'40 Year-Old Virgin' actor goes beserk with a knife. WWTDD

Britney on the comeback trail, giving an interview where she doesn't foam at the mouth and steal everything in sight. Dlisted

Mariah Carey's neighbours complain about the noise, and it's not her singing. Contactmusic

Tori Spelling went out shopping without her ribcage. Celebwarship

If it wasn't for the head, Geri Halliwell might pull off the 'attractive' thing. Laineygossip

Forget 'The Dark Knight'. This is the premiere of THE film of the year. Popsugar

Surprisingly, Ben and Jerry's decide not to name an ice cream after Amy Winehouse. Yeeeah

Who has the most-read (and dullest) blog in the world? Bild

Remember 'Lost'? It lost its audience and now its stars have lost all sense of finance. Mikeymars

The 50 sexiest music videos of all time? You can watch most of them, but does contain Le Bon. Nerve

It looks like Amy Winehouse is still having a bit of a strop after being passed over in favour of Jack White and Alicia Keys in the choice for the new Bond film theme. Amy was the hot favourite for the gig, having recorded a song with Mark Ronson for the upcoming 'Quantum Of Solace' movie, until producers noticed she was unable to string a sentence together and seemed addicted to visiting the nearest hospital with a revolving door.

Mitch Winehouse, who is in no way making money or gaining publicity out of his drug addicted daughter, was reported to be taking over from Danny Baker while he's on holiday (let it be just a long weekend) as a co host on BBC Radio London. But now we hear that Amy may join him on air - as an agony aunt. WTF?

Amy Winehouse has a Slush Puppy machine delivered to her house? The luxury! TMZ

Lindsay Lohan forgot to stop off at Planet Bra on her way out. WWTDD

Katie Holmes in auditions for the Dexy's Midnight Runners comeback tour. Dlisted

Rhys Ifans acting like an utter prick, as usual. Contactmusic

Christina Applegate diagnosed with breast cancer. Celebwarship

More on Verne Troyer. Could you be scared of his 'drunken rage' when he isn’t even three feet high? Mollygood

James Blunt blasts media intrusion. Co-incidentally, he has a new single out today. ICYDK

Tommy Lee asks Pamela Anderson to marry him every day. Must have a shocking memory. Hollyscoop

When Christian Bale lost all sense and began to resemble the Hoff. Laineygossip

Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick are living a lie. Yeeeah

Hayden Panettiere not too delighted at getting a parking ticket. Mikeymars

Kate Moss goes on holiday. With her daughter. Popsugar

A picture of the exact moment a child learns the concept of evil. TMZ

Rihanna nips out to a club in New York. WWTDD

Jennifer Aniston also nips out to the shops. Laineygossip

The nipple hat-trick. Halle Berry shows magnificent support for Barack Obama. Celebwarship

1000 Chinese earthquake victims sue Sharon Stone for $1bn. Now that's karma. NyPost

Guy Ritchie talking his usual brand of common sense. Dlisted

Kim Basinger is worried about the troubles in Iraq. For tigers. Contactmusic

Kanye West feels 'humbled'. There's a first for everything. Stereohyped

Amy Winehouse 'gutted' over Bond Theme snub, but as usual Mark Ronson takes it on the chin. ICYDK

Snoop Dogg may have been arrested for possession of marijuana. Never saw this coming. Hollyscoop

Surely Heather Mills' ex PR woman isn't calling her a liar? Deceiver

Carmen Electra does 'Hamlet'. Just joking, she's stripping off again. TMZ

Amy Winehouse receives an urgent shipment of what might be blood. WWTDD

You can see why Sam Ronson usually wears a hat. Dlisted

Who you gonna call? Steve Carrell. There may be a new 'Ghostbusters' movie. Contactmusic

This is why Selma Hayek's baby always looks delighted. Derekhail

What made Naomi Campbell and Heidi Klum fall for this multi-billionaire? Celebwarship

For some reason Samantha Ronson's career is on the up. Can't think why. Mollygood

Ali Lohan cuts to the chase and auditions for a porn director. Hollyscoop

Did Katie Holmes evict Tom's mother and sister from the house? ICYDK

Tori Spelling (and her ever-interesting face) are down on their luck. Laineygossip

Kate Hudson and Lance Armstrong are no longer having a ball. Yeeeah