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R Kelly due to face trial for child pornography charges

Forget P Diddy, here's R Kiddy-Fiddly

R Kelly due to face trial for child pornography charges

rkellyIt's been over five years since R'n'B star R Kelly was charged with multiple counts of child-related nastiness, and finally the US justice system has slouched into action, setting a court date of September 17 for the trial of the man who is innocent until he is proven guilty, but will forever be haunted by rumours.

'R', real name Robert (ha ha!) was charged with 21 counts of possession of child pornography in 2002. Luckily, seven charges were dropped, so he now just has to defend himself against just the 14 allegations. The lucky bastard.

The major charge is that 'R' videotaped himself (how crude... no DVDs?) having a bit of the old in-out with a girl who is alleged to have been 13 years old at the time. Which any court will tell you, makes him a dirty old man.

The trial was due to take place last year, but Judge Gaughan fell/threw himself off a ladder and basically broke himself. Nice try, Gaughan, but you're doing it, OK?

COMMENTS
JoMama on Fri 03 August 2007 said...
Didn't he start knobbing Aaliyah when she was 13 or something as well? Dirty cunt, she's better off dead having had that cunt slobbering away on top of her. Rate him for getting involved with the water sports mind you, that is fucking hilarious.
JoMama on Fri 03 August 2007 said...
Speaking of which, just had a haunting reminder of the time a fat bird did actually piss on me. What is wrong with these people?
sirbuckle on Fri 03 August 2007 said...
There'll be plenty probing the Kelly trap 2 when he goes down for kiddyfiddlin
JiggeryCock on Fri 03 August 2007 said...
...and you can shove that glass pyramid right up your lower bowel - not for the child-bending but for crimes against music.
Sundaeg1rl on Fri 03 August 2007 said...
You're fucking slow!!! This was posted on Yahoo (and by me on the board) two days ago...
on Fri 03 August 2007 said...
as long as the vile peado spade gets a long sentance in gen-pop, we'll all be very happy campers
Sundaeg1rl on Fri 03 August 2007 said...
As I sang so sweetly before:

#he walks to the courtroom, he's close to the courtroom, now he's entering the courtroom.
Now pause the movie cos what i'm about to say to ya'll is so damn upfront,
Not only is there a man in the courtroom, but the man... is a CUNT...cunt...cunt...#
LuciferSam on Fri 03 August 2007 said...
He hasn't been locked up for being a cunt with an atrocious catalogue of idiotic songs, so he sure won't be locked up for this.
thingymabob on Fri 03 August 2007 said...
but he gets longer then mr langham! and he won't get the chance to plug his latest cd(or little kid!) on his release! i wonder if it would be alright for me to watch mr langhams boys being abused bcos it would make me a bigger man then the cunt in the videos propa white trash!
Zigmund on Sat 04 August 2007 said...
How soon do you think it'll be before he'll bring out the whole "I was abused as a child" defence? The man may be a paedophile, But Trapped In The Closet is a masterpiece.
cuntlicker2000 on Sat 04 August 2007 said...
I would like to see Mr. Kelly severly buggered by a geriatric man wearing a steel spiked dildo. It would puncture his lower intestines and he would die slowly in a pool of his own excrement. That would learn him.
ivor on Sat 04 August 2007 said...
My boss came out with a classic when he first got caught for fiddling and hotel was still being played on the radio . . .replacing the line about leaving in the morning to "you'll still be 6 in the morning" oh how we laughed
bystander on Sat 04 August 2007 said...
If we lock up every celebrity/rock/pop type person who's shagged under age girls (and boys for that matter) there isn't going to be much room left in Her Majesties Prisons. What's happened to Heroes and the corner? I think we should be told.
Dames on Sun 05 August 2007 said...
Fuckin great couple of albums his first... what if Kaiser Chiefs/The Gossip/Morrisey/S.Sisters ever slip up? What will all you lot of indie wankers do then?
LoneGunMan on Tue 07 August 2007 said...
All this "he might be a paedophile but" bollocks is irrelevant. He's a fucking nonse and he should have boiling oil poured over his, innocence taking, groin area before being dragged across glass naked......................CUNT
TONKA on Tue 07 August 2007 said...
if he gets found guilty of being a NONCE burn him. just fucking burn him. end of.
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