A LITTLE LESS DEPORTATION

The 'doctor' who injected car engine lubricant into the faces of many Hollywood women (including Priscilla Presley) whilst claiming it was a miracle anti-ageing cure is facing deportation from the US back to his native Argentina. This is on grounds of 'moral turpitude', though if everyone in Hollywood had to face the same charge the place would be virtually empty tomorrow.

Daniel Serrano will appear before the American immigration courts on April 9 and must come up with some reasons as to why he should not be removed from the country (apart from being the most laughable and loveable medical charlatan since Dr Nick from 'The Simpsons').

Serrano is a fully-qualified doctor in Argentina, so what's the problem? Well perhaps because the qualification of 'doctor' in Argentina is the equivalent of 'nurse' in the US (and most of the rest of the world) which means that he is basically a bog-standard ward worker unqualified to make diagnoses, though he does have better access to garage lubricants.

He is also a 'nurse' who has just been convicted of smuggling drugs over the US border, namely a type of miracle wrinkle remover that you might be more likely to find in Halfords than Harley Street, what with it lubricating car engines rather better than human cheekbones.

So he's just a nurse with a love for syringes, faces and automotive lubricants. Maybe he'd be better off pretending to be an undertaker? After all, he's made Priscilla look like a waxy looking corpse stuffed to the gills with formaldehyde.