Shorn Of The Dead

Pete Doherty has revealed that he may try one last gasp flirtation with fame before the Kate Moss magic wears off.

Yes, the greatest poet of our generation has decided that the most original thing he can do in order to keep his fat face in the public eye is... to have all of his hair cut off.

Brilliant idea. It worked so well for Britney, who was at much the same mental level as Pete when she shaved off her locks, though at least she just looked spotty rather than appearing to have advanced leprosy.

He looky like a sweaty little sausage anyway, and at least that greasy crash helmet he calls 'hair' soaks up some of the night sweats, so a fully shaven bonce will be an utter fashion disaster. It's probably only the hair keeping the collection of loose skin, pus and boils together at present.

And if he shaves it off, he'll just look like Marlon Brando playing Colonel Kurtz in 'Apocalypse Now'. But less buff.