PARIS NO MATES

Is Paris Hilton turning into the US version of Jodie Marsh? The British 'model' with a nose like an angry weekend in Istanbul famously failed to attract any eligible bachelors when she attempted to whore herself up the aisle by asking for suitable suitors for a reality show. In a similar vein, Paris Hilton was underwhelmed by people wanting to appear on her latest reality show, which sought to find an ocean of idiots who would pretend to be her new best friend forever.

In a country of 300 million people, the grand sum of 40 fools were prepared to step up to the plate and admit that they would like to be Paris Hilton's friend, which means that her Facebook account will be unlikely to have the internet servers groaning under the weight of pokes any time soon.

To make matters worse, of the 40 people who attended the auditions, a large percentage were utter fuckwits whose prime motivation in appearing was to be on TV.

Surprise! Much like the woman herself, though Paris is denying that she is an unpopular, desperate wonk-eyed twat on her MySpace page.

Here's a transcript of her comments which reads like a whine menu.

Hardly likely to win her any new 'friends' I wouldn't have thought...