HE CAN'T SMILE WIDE ENOUGH

Nick Cannon, Mariah Carey's husband of a few weeks has laughed off rumours that the couple are headed for divorce. OK! magazine ran a story last week saying that the marriage was on the rocks and that Nick was treated like a servant by the singer.

Not so, says Nick, who looking out from a luxury yacht and with millions of dollars suddenly available on his Visa card, appeared to be in quite a good mood.

Nick took the time to speak to People.com, attempting to wipe away his shit-eating grin for long enough to splutter out a couple of sentences, revealing that he is very happy with his generous and rich wife (and why wouldn't he be – he must be as smug as a cat with a cream-flavoured arsehole).

"Marriage is amazing. It's the best thing that ever happened to me."

You might note that he said not 'US', but 'ME'. Says it all really, and the best of luck to him.