AUTEUR YOUR HEART TO ME

Madonna launched her directorial debut at the Berlin Film Festival yesterday. The (thankfully) short film 'Filth and Wisdom' was given a less-than-rapturous reception by fans and critics, though both joined together to thank the Lord that it wasn't her husband Guy Ritchie behind the lens.

The reaction ranged from 'lukewarm' through to 'cool' and then all the way to 'colder than a penguin's toes'. It seems to be about a man pretending to be a female dominatrix and the people in his life who all aspire to be something that they are not. Like film directors, perhaps?

Madonna further cemented her credentials as all-round Renaissance Woman (or Jack Of All Trades in more accurate terms) when she mentioned some of the people who have had an influence on her career, and whom she aspired to emulate.

"Godard, Visconti, Pasolini and Fellini."

Presumably she knew that these are directors rather than four types of pasta. Oddly enough, there was no mention of the name 'Ritchie' on that list. Even she wouldn't have the balls to be that cheeky. And Godard may have made some wonderful films, but could anyone truly say he made something as original and as witty as 'Body of Evidence'? I'd certainly never seen anything like it before and laughed all the way through.