IN BED WITH MADONNA

We know that Madonna has been phoning in her performances for years, but she's really taking it too far this time, revealing that her and Guy Ritchie are more interested in their BlackBerrys when they're in bed than each other. Though to be fair we don't really blame them...

The 49-year-old singer, who's looking more like Zelda off Terrahawks with every passing day, said:

"We lie right next to each other with our BlackBerrys under our pillows. It's not unromantic, it's practical.

"I'm sure loads of couples have their BlackBerrys in bed with them.

"I often wake up in the middle of the night and remember that I’ve forgotten something, so I jump up and make notes."

Ooh baby, I just know when you're making notes that what you're really trying to say is that it's Business Time, oh yeah!

But Madge thinks that she and Mockney Duke Ritchie are perfect for each other.
 

"I had to marry someone as tough as me. Guy’s definitely tough. I had to marry a challenge, otherwise I would just get bored.

"Whatever else Guy is, he’s never boring."

Which isn't something that you can say about his films...