MILKING THE CASH COWS

With one daughter suffering a mental collapse and the other one up the duff at the age of 16, you'd think Lynne Spears might have other things on her mind than penning an autobiography, but it's clear that the one thing that is always on her mind is money, hence her rushing out the shoddy story while her children are still in the limelight. And an epic story needs an epic title, of course...

'Through the Storm: A Real Story of Fame and Family in a Tabloid World.' with the strapline 'Her story of what it was like being a mom and raising two very famous people.' Whilst making herself famous at the same time.

How touching, though 'How To Raise A Pair Of Cash Cows' might have been more accurate. It's been a difficult year for Britney and her family. Surely Lynne was more caught up in addressing the problems of her daughters than putting pen to paper? Well, no. According to sources the writing of the book came first, because it will be beneficial to the girls, you see!

"She wants to express her love for her children and tell their stories through a mother's eyes."

In other words, Lynne couldn't go to help her daughter when she was shaving her head in public as she simply had to finish that chapter about Britney shaving her head in public.