BONKA BONKERS

The ongoing flirtation between Keith Richards and life fascinates us all. Despite the fact he looks like Tutankhamun's dad, the rock legend is still out there every night on stage, putting musicians half his age to shame. And it's all down to his tried and trusted exercise regime - playing gigs and plenty of (shudder) sex.

Maybe they're all at it. Jagger's looking more like a scrotum with every passing day, though according to what Keith told Uncut magazine, Mick is a bit of a health and fitness master.

"I think a lot of Mick's frenzy about physical stuff is actually mental. That's the way he is. For me, doing a Rolling Stones show for two hours a night, that's enough fuckin' exercise, you know? Then I've got to go to bed with the old lady, bonka bonka. You know?"

I know that the last time Keith did anything energetic it involved falling out of a tree and fracturing his skull. Maybe the 'bonka bonka' thing is caused by that.

One thing's for sure: with Keith's exercise from his day job and his night-time shenanigans he probably has the strongest wrists in the world.