Wishing The Days Away

Oh yes, it's The Daily Doherty: It seems Kate Moss decided to split with oozing fungal feast Pete Doherty not because of his affairs with groupies but because she discovered his will and learned that he expects to die soon.

When Moss found the will (probably written and misspelt in his own blood) Doherty admitted he had told his family about the document but kept it from her. It outlined his plans to live fast, die young, leave a bloated and ugly corpse and a lucrative 'Doherty Died For Us' business to the bloodsuckers who've been impatiently waiting for him to kick the bucket for the last four years.

Moss feared Doherty would follow in the footsteps of legends such as Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin. She was mistaken; one or two (arguably) passable songs, a cistern full of awful ones and acres of tabloid coverage don't really make you a legend. They make you a dead idiot. (He's outlived the fabled rock star death age of 27 now anyway.)

All that will remain is a huge hole in the earnings of stupid-hat makers and a very challenging cadaver for medical students to practice dissection on.