Jordan & Peter: Ground Zero Talent

News reaches us that Jordan & Peter Andre's 'hit' TV shows will be aired in the States.

America has given us many great things: Steven Seagal; Rock 'n’ Roll; Damn it, Chloe!; some of the greatest small screen entertainment of all time. Well, now it’s time for payback!

In one of the most unpleasant donations since Custer gave out smallpox-infected blankets to American Indians, we’re setting Katie "Jordan" Price and Peter "Penis" Andre on the States and hoping to achieve a similar result.

The three shows already shown in the UK ('When Jordan Met Peter’, ‘Laid Bare’ and ‘Marriage and Mayhem’) will be airing on the ‘E’ channel from 21st April (or 4/21 as it will forever be known to future generations).

That’s for Vanilla Ice, you bastards!