DUMB AND BURMA

Canadian used-to-be-almost-funnyman Jim Carrey appears to be under the impression that he's still shooting the film 'Bruce Almighty' (a terrible movie where he is given God-like powers) after thinking with his brain and deciding that having been paid millions for not doing very much gives him the authority to talk about world affairs, a recognised medical condition known as 'Bono-ism'.

In a classic example of 'And How The Fuck Is This Your Business?', he has called on the United Nations to ban the sale of arms to Myanmar (aka Burma), to prevent the Burmese authorities from killing monks or banning Christmas or something. He's a little sketchy on the details, but he feels his heart is in the right place. He's wrong. It would be much better scattered several feet away from his chest cavity and pumping its last.

"The time has come for the United Nations Security Council to start acting less like a group of corporations and more like united nations," cried Carrey, whilst pulling a funny face and showing his gums, failing to see the irony in a performer like himself giving anyone advice on acting.

Well, that's Burma sorted out now, thanks to the rubber-faced comic. How sad that our own Rowan Atkinson has failed to denounce the land clearances and political persecution in Zimbabwe. Robert Mugabe is still in power, Mr Bean, and where are you when this once proud nation cries out for help? Silent. As usual. And that silence speaks volumes. Shame on you, Mr Bean, shame on you, you twat!