SPEARS TO ESPOUSE?

Sorry to persist in breathing life into publicity-hungry talent vacuums like these, but it is being reported that Jamie Lynn Spears (and her Cletus foetus) has become engaged to her baby daddy to be, Casey Aldridge.

The odds on the 16-year-old Jamie-Lynn and 19-year-old Casey making it through even a year of marriage must be roughly equivalent to Gareth Gates making a successful comeback, but these idiots have to fill their time doing something so why not tie the knot a guarantee a load of lawyers half your income for the foreseeable?

"She's got an engagement ring. She's been showing it off, talking about it," said an entirely made-up source.

Well at least there's a good family record: parents divorced, sister twice divorced by 26. Good luck, JL, you're going to fucking need it.