JOHNNY KNOCKS NUTS

Boss being a tosser today? Printer not working? Missed the bus this morning maybe? Well if any of that sounds like a ballache, spare a thought for 'Jackass' man Johnny Knoxville, who has royally done his nuts in during a failed motorcycle stunt.

The culturally sanctioned lunatic was left with what reports are calling 'bloody balls' (arghhh!!!) when he fucked up during an attempt to recreate a motorcycle backflip for a MTV tribute to late stuntman Evel Knievel.

Knoxville was rushed to hospital after the incident earlier this month, and will have to wear a colostomy bag for the next fortnight to help him piss. Now that is a ballache.

Writing on his blog, he says:

"Just got back from Oklahoma where I was shooting 'Mat Hoffman's tribute to Evel Knievel.' Had a ball, too, even though I almost lost my own balls in the process.

"Don't want to give too much away because the tribute airs February 23rd on MTV, but let's just say before letting (stunt trainer) Travis Pastrana teach me how to do a backflip on a motorcycle I should have had him teach me to ride one first. Heh-heh... Bad for me, good for our viewing audience at home.

"Have to go now. Have to empty the piss bag on my leg that I have to
wear for the next two weeks until my torn urethra heals. Ouch!"

And as some of these clips show, the man clearly hasn't got enough love for his nadgers. Look after them, boy!