DIDDY DO IT?

It looks like Sean "P Diddy" "Puff Wanky" Combs has got bored of waiting for Sienna Miller and has upgraded himself to a much more A-List blonde actress by getting together with Cameron Diaz. Just imagine if they got married – she could become Cameron Diaz-Diddy, which would amuse us no end...

The rap mogul who has somehow made a name and fortune for himself in hip hop whilst being one of the shittest rappers in the history of the world ('I'll Be Missing You' is as good an example as you'll need), no longer needs to work so mostly spends his time stinking up the place with his perfume brand and trying to nail blonde actresses. Last week he was reported to be writing a romantic comedy for Sienna Miller in an attempt to woo her. If Rhys Ifans can do it, surely you don't need to put that much effort in...

Diddy and Diaz apparently "hooked up" at a book launch for Prince over the weekend where they were described as looking "very cozy together", laughing and holding hands.

A source said that later at Prince's Beverly Hills mansion, "Diddy was bringing his lips towards hers when he realized someone was approaching. Smiling, they closed the theatre's door and locked it."

Maybe they were just like, look there's that fucker of a 'source' who's always making shit up for the papers, let's lock him the hell out.

But Diddy, 38, has denied the reports, saying, "We are just friends."

Let's hope so, because if the kids got the bad features of both we could be in for some monster looking children.