DARK, SATANIC MILLS

Heather Mills is appealing. Geez, that must be the FIRST time in history that that has been written. Where were we? Yes, Heather Mills is appealing the decision to make public her divorce settlement which she claims was just so Sir Paul McCartney could look like The Man.

The 40-year-old, who is said to have originally asked for £125m from the Beatle, has won £24.3m but is still cheesed off.

"I'm so glad it's over and it was an incredible result in the end," Mills said outside court.

"Sir Paul offered me £15.8, all in including properties, and we got ... I don't remember the figures because the most important thing is just to get this over and done with."

"Paul appealed, said he wanted it public. He has always wanted it public because he wants to make it look like he is generous support."

"The courts don’t want the litigating person to do well. Fiona [Paul's lawyer] has handled this in the worse way possible. She has called me names.”

Boo bloody hoo. The lawyer lady called the put upon story-teller names and the big rich guitar man still gets praise. BOO. FUCKING HOO.

What a load of old shit.