THE MAN WHO WASN'T THERE

Maybe Billy Bob Thornton went utterly mental after losing Angelina Jolie (what else can explain his music career?) but he is now claiming that he has a friendly ghost in his house. Not only does the spirit give off a welcoming presence but it also occasionally chips in and helps him when he's writing songs, he tells Maxim magazine. Cuckoo!

"We heard lots of things in the house that just didn't make any sense."

Maybe it was just Billy talking to himself again. Hardly proof of a ghostly infestation, is it?

"On my last solo record, there were a couple of noises that didn't seem to come from any place we could identify. There's been a couple of times I've been writing a song, and I'll get stuck on a line, and all of a sudden I'll come up with something out of nowhere. Maybe the ghost is helping me out."

Yes maybe it's the ghost helping out or maybe Billy's fried brain is finally spluttering out as the last synapses die off. Hang on, a ghost that helps to write songs? In a house that used to be owned by Slash from Guns N' Roses? Now I'm no Scooby Doo, but I'd wager there's no ghost, just a confused old rocker who has forgotten to move out of the attic.