CRAIG GAYVID

We always thought that Craig 'Fatter than your average' David was staunchly hetero - I mean he certainly bangs on about women enough doesn't he? But doth he protest too much? Either way, where there's a record to be sold, there's an interview to be given. Especially as his last single crept into the charts at a lowly 39 and his current album was way below his usual chart highs, only making number 18.

Speaking to a magazine about an experience in a gay club he said:

"It was a sick night. Some of the guys I was with were a bit weirded out by being chatted up by a guy.

"If you're closed-minded, you never know what to do."

Seriously, does anyone still use the word 'sick'?

And showing that he is totally au fait with all things pink, he added, not stereotyping gay men in any way: "My interior decorator is in a gay relationship. He's one of the coolest guys I know. He's got a real air of, 'Trust me, I'll make things happen.'"

His interior decorator is gay? Could he not come up with any more of a cliche? We're surprised he didn't just go for hairdresser or flight attendant and be done with it.

But the burning question is: who would Craig go gay for?

"It'd have to be Brad Pitt. Or David Beckham - they're hot! You can't deny it. Every guy in the world thinks so."

No real surprises there, but Craig singing 'Can You Fill Me In?' suddenly conjures up a whole new image.