COUNTRY LEGEND POSTPONES TOUR DUE TO BOOB INJURY

DOLLY CODDLED

Published on Tue 12 February 2008 by Fatty

COUNTRY LEGEND POSTPONES TOUR DUE TO BOOB INJURY

Yesterday we told you that the truly wonderful Dolly Parton's boobs are public property. Wonderful indeed. But today we must inform you that the strain of hefting all that 'public property' around has hurt the pert 62-year-old's back and she's had to cancel her tour. WE'LL TAKE THEM OFF YOU, DOLLY!

Oh Dolly, lovely Dolly. Forced to rest for six to wight weeks because her poor back needs a break. And told to sack off her touring commitments too.

Oh Dolly.

"I know I have been breaking my neck and bending over backwards trying to get my new CD and world tour together, but I didn't mean to hurt myself doing it," said Dolly in a statement.

“But hey, you try wagging these puppies around a while and see if you don't have back problems. Seriously though, the doctors said I will be good as new in a few weeks, and I can't wait to get back out there."

Here's 'Shock' and 'Awe' and Dolly at their finest. Get well soon, Dolly and the puppies. Puppies!

Dolly Parton, boobs, cancels tour, public property, Backwoods Barbie, Jolene, 9-5, holy moly, celebrities

pass it on print article

DAY TWO IN VEGAS
LILY ALLEN LASHES OUT AGAIN
THE TALE OF JACK AND AMY
HERBIE: FULLY CLOTHED
NEWSMOUND

GREG'S NASTIES
ACTING UP
MILLER�S CROSSING (THE ATLANTIC)
WORKING 9 TO 9.05
BACKE ON TEH DRUGGES AGANE!

COMMENTS

		PrincessTiiaammii on Tue 12 February 2008 said... She's fucking ace!
		thingymabob on Tue 12 February 2008 said... didnt know the peggy rented out the upstairs of the queen vic its like the fucking tardis!
		TheMonk on Tue 12 February 2008 said... I submitted Dolly as a hero at about 9am this morning because of that very quote and you've just gone and stolen all the glory. You thieving get, HM, do your own research.
		squealer on Tue 12 February 2008 said... A 62-year-old's tits! Public property! Fuck off Holy Moly that's disgusting, what next? Dot Cotton's arse? Why not just send a mole to the local bingo hall a take snaps of the blue rinsers. Sick fuckers.
		redpixie on Tue 12 February 2008 said... ah now, The Monk.... i submitted her as a hero a week ago....
		redpixie on Tue 12 February 2008 said... p.s. loving the new profile picture..... sweats
		thingymabob on Tue 12 February 2008 said... steady! disco stu does the 70's
		TheMonk on Tue 12 February 2008 said... I know redpixie, and you'll always come first (fnar fnar) but she's doing the rounds at the moment and deserved another mention, as this item proves ps. glad you like. It's from my .. ahem.. personal collection
		redpixie on Tue 12 February 2008 said... mmm... furry
		TheMonk on Tue 12 February 2008 said... And freshly shampoo-ed too to get more bounce to the ounce
		Dames on Tue 12 February 2008 said... metro pinup that could've had promising career a la Candy Samples or Helga Sven and fkd up, fkn metro Sissor Sisters-loving hick backwoods braying one-trick hag.