MUM'S THE WORD

Heartiest congratulations to Charlotte Church and Gavin Henson (the wooden fellow from the Cuprinol adverts) who have celebrated the birth of their first child in the traditional manner: by selling the photos and all the details to a glossy magazine.

This means that the nation can share in their joy, as long as we shell out about £1.90 for the dubious pleasure of 15 horribly-posed shots and five pages of sickly quotes.

Naturally, because of this binding agreement, details are sparse. We know it's a girl, but no details on the name have been revealed. If the contract is as watertight as the lawyers would like, no doubt we'll soon be seeing lots of pictures of little 'Hello' Church in the tabloids, or maybe 'OK' Henson (which pretty much describes his rugby career to date).

So mother and baby are doing well. Really well. A few hours old and the pounds are rolling in already, enough to keep Mummy in WKD and Daddy in creosote moisturiser for a few years to come.