DAILY BRITNEY

Ding Ding! Roll up, roll up for the circus is back in town. Britney Spears was released from hospital yesterday after doctors held a meeting and decided that she was fit and well enough to go home. After a series of talks the medics decided that she posed no threat to herself and they had no power to hold her after 11.30am, meaning Britney slipped away quietly from the UCLA Medical Centre.

Phew! Clearly she learned some sort of lesson in the last week of psychiatric care, as she and her security team managed to quietly leave without waking the sleeping dragon of the paparazzi. And all was well in the world of Britney.

She then made the doctors look like idiots by returning home, waiting for the paparazzi to assemble outside (after news of her homecoming was leaked by persons unknown) then setting off for a leisurely drive with her bodyguard, surrounded by half of the world's paparazzi. And where would you head after a week in a psychiatric ward?

Why to the Beverly Hills Hotel where she met up with on-off boyfriend, photographer Adnan Ghalib. What the fuck? Then, after a quick chat to the paparazzi in her British accent Britney and Adnan drove off to see her lawyer, again surrounded by more press that OJ Simpson managed in a month of publicity-seeking.

Obviously, the singer's parents were less than delighted by this turn of events, which sees their daughter's mental health apparently right back to square one before her forced hospitalisation. They issued a statement saying,

"As parents of an adult child in the throws of a mental health crisis, we were extremely disappointed this morning to learn that over the recommendation of her treating psychiatrist, our daughter Britney was released from the hospital that could best care for her and keep her safe. We are deeply concerned about our daughter's safety and vulnerability and we believe her life is presently at risk. There are conservatorship orders in place created to protect our daughter that are being blatantly disregarded. We ask only that the court's orders be enforced so that a tragedy may be averted."

Jamie Spears plans to be back in the courtroom tomorrow to have the conservatorship (wtf?) order strengthened in order to restrict the people allowed to visit Britney. One group not allowed close contact is the paparazzi, though of course her boyfriend Adnan, who she just happens to have spent most of yesterday sharing a car with, is... a paparazzo.

All very sad and Groundhog Day. One thing's for certain. There are sure to be some urgent meetings between doctors at UCLA today as they decide who to fire over this whole issue of releasing a mentally ill woman into a pack of snapping wolves.