Scram-gelina

Oh dear, it appears that the romance of the decade may be in tatters. Brad Pitt is viewing bachelor flats in Berlin and Angelina Jolie is so desperate to be out of his life that's she's dieting in an attempt to weigh less than an atom, allowing her to float away on a breeze.

It can't be easy for either of them. There's the paparazzi scrutinising their every adoption and Brad's annoyance whenever a child from a new ethnic group appears at the foot of the bed saying, "Daddy?"

On the bright side, this puts Angelina back on the market. Just don't offer to take her out for dinner or you'll be sitting alone at the table every few minutes as she rushes off with a determined look in her eye and her fingers reaching into her mouth.

Brad shouldn't be alone for too long though. After all, Jennifer Aniston's back in the game as well.