BROWN AND OUT

Amazingly, Bobby Brown has cocked up yet another relationship, been kicked out of his house and missed a meeting about doing a book ALL ON THE SAME DAY! How did he manage it? He was pissed on Tequila, of course, well it's his prerogative (etc).

Ex-girlfriend Karrine Steffans told 'Sister 2 Sister' magazine (sounds like an unbiased publication): "I got HarperCollins interested in a book deal for Bobby... but he got too drunk to go to the meeting. I was trying to help him put his life back together. He drank a whole bottle of Patron tequila and missed the meeting, and made me look like an idiot."

So sadly the world may never read the intimate thoughts of Bobby Brown, although he's probably telling anyone who'll listen at a bar somewhere with his mates MC Hammer and Mark Morrison: "See that Whitney... I've had her, (hic) and look, look (hic) check out these dance moves eh Hammer, you can't fucking touch this."