50 Cent: Better The Devil, You Know

Cartoon rapper 50 Cent (so called because his real name is Arthur Dollar*) has angered a lunatic Christian group in the US.

Bible-thumping nutjobs Resistance, who have taken it upon themselves to monitor how Christianity is portrayed in the American media, are fuming because the pisspoor hip-hop star has been wearing vulgar, diamond-encrusted crucifixes around his neck and asked him to stop wearing them. "He is defaming the cross and committing blasphemy," said Resistance founder Mark Dice. "I think a large, diamond-studded, platinum Satanic pentagram would be more appropriate."

Resistance has previously savaged Jessica Simpson in its quest for a God-fearing USA, presumably for being a beak-faced no-talent with all the sexual allure of a turd in a grease-stained McDonald's bag.

To his credit, 50 Cent's manager, when told of the crazed God-bothers' orders, responded with all the dignity that their daft instruction demanded, saying: "We aren't aware of this absurd request."

And to think they could have had a go at him for promoting violence, glamorising drug dealing and gang life, or just for writing shit lyrics and poncing about in a nasty vest instead. The silly twats.


*Yes, I know his name's not really Arthur Dollar.