THE HEROES
| Having a wank before leaving for work | Makes me late virtually every day, but it's well worth it. |
| HM | Because since the Radio London speed-reading newsreaders rant I've noticed a remarkable improvement in the quality/delivery of the news, traffic and weather reports. Well done, HM, for proving to be such a valuable public service asset. Unlike the BBC... |
| Harry Hill | Cos TV Burp is returning soon and he makes You've Been Framed watchable again. (See? you can polish a turd ITV) |
| Hugh Hefner | Because every hetrosexual male wishes they could live his life (even if it's only for 1 day) |
| Holidays | Three and a half weeks off work. No phone calls, no email, no t'interweb, no colleagues, no boss, no clients and no reading the shit the drivel posted on HolyMoly. Happy days. |
| Holy Moly | I think its all about time we give Mr holy Moly three cheers for his outstandingly funny stories this week Hip Hip ....... |
| Hull City football club | For matching Derby total wins last season in their first ever premiership game |
| HD TV | Because after it everything else looks like a badly drawn cartoon. |
| Henry the tuatara lizard thing | popped his cherry aged 111 - you don't want to rush into these things. |
| Holy Moly's Big Brother Commentary | Hilarious. |
| HM Big Brother blogger | Bless him/her/it. Mr HM made some promise to a bookie about 'Daily coverage' and 'Fresh content' in exchange for a briefcase full of cash, and now this poor schlep has to sit through every ball-achingly dull episode of that dreck, just so they can drag out yet another a post's worth of material, to be met with chorus after resounding chorus of 'NO RANTS YET'. Sir/madam/thingy you are a trooper, and if you make it to the final week I'll buy you a pint. |
| Holy Moly Posters | for finally doing some good in this bleak, wretched and god forsaken world and indulging en masse in some good old fashioned yank baiting on the WWTDD website housepage. Biscuits for all! |
| Homer Simpson | "Buddy, your car was upside down when we got here. And as for your Grandma, she shouldn't have mouthed off like that." "Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him." "I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman." "He didn't give you gay, did he?" "Marge, you're not gonna believe this but I'm stuck inside of two vending machines." "You're not the only one who can abuse a non-profit organization." "Bart, a woman is like a beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one." "Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races." "I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to speed around the town, keeping its speed above 50. And if its speed dropped, it would explode! I think it was called 'The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down'." "Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain what's his name? We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun?! Well I didn't hear anybody laughing, did you?! Except at that guy who made sound effects." Homer Simpson, you're a genius! |
| Humphrey Lyttleton | I'm trying one last sodding time...he more than deserves it. |
| hugh fearnley-whittingstall | teaching Brits there's more to food than the word Findus, crispy and pancakes |
| Hob Nobs | New Bigger Biscuit; barely fits in my tea. |
| HM | Takes the mundane slice of my life and adds cherries. |
| Havianas | That middle bit doesn't break as soon as you run a few yards on these flip-flops. So you can fuck off now Next/Topman, I never have to go in to your 'straight out of Hollyoaks' shops any more to buy your shitty but irresistibly cheap flip-flops. |
| HolyMoly | For the line "Anyway, we hear it was a very emotional affair - even the cake was in tiers (boom boom!)." So awful that it is actually brilliant! |
| Holy Moly | As much as we like to bitch and moan I dread to think how slowly my day would go without you. |