THE HEROES
| George Carlin | A comedy legend who died on sunday. One of the most out spoken, fearless and supremely talented comedien ever. |
| Giles Coren | For happily stuffing his face full of hideous 'historical' food every minute of every day on Supersize Me, and making gorging look kinda sexy. For drinking enough claret to make George Best feel faint yet still being able to speak on camera, and for admirably flirting with sensible-shoes-wearer Sue Perkins. This man has enough joie de vivre to cheer up the whole of Stevenage. |
| Glasvegas | At last, a new band that's actually really good and not made up with pretty boys with elaborate hair styles. |
| Gok Wan | This bloke convinces women that they don't have to look like cunting Victoria Beckham, the skeletal coke-fiend or some tacky, z-list OK regular and that they would give any man the full-on chubby without really trying. That makes him a good guy in my book. |
| Gram Parsons | Got kicked out of Nashville for daring to do country versions of soul songs. Taught Keef country music, allthough Keef did teach him the joys of smack in return, Worked with the Stones and the Byrds on their least successful albums. Found dead in a hotel room with a groupie showing ice cubes up his arse to revive him from his O.D. The autopsy was unable to determine if it was the morphine, brandy, cocaine, or amphetamines which killed him. Had a strange death pact with a roadie which led to his corpse being exhumed and drunkenly driven to, and burried under the Joshua tree. Oh and made some cracking records too, and created a genre as well. |
| GTA IV | Goodbye summer!!!! |
| Garlic Bread | you are a delicious hero when you get in from the pub. Also I fucking hate Peter Kay so don't even try and pull me up on that one. |
| Giles Coren | For his review of Goodfellas restaurant in Belfast: "I'd have guessed I was eating thin strips of mole poached in Ovaltine...Ms Workman said it was inedible but, to be honest, as it sits before me, congealing quietly, I cannot leave it alone but return to it every few minutes with the grim fascination of a toddler mesmerised by a pile of its own faeces, nibbling at it, gurning with revulsion, then nibbling some more. If you've ever sniffed your finger after scratching your arse, and then done it again, then this dish may not be entirely wasted on you" |
| Gardener's World | For having a woman on there, and I kid you not, who's name is: "Gay Search" |
| Gene Hunt | Hard as a coffin nail, no fucking about with this lad if only the coppers of today were more like him the country would be a much better place |
| Global Warming | Flowers are in bloom everywhere, apple and cherry blossoms too and it's about 12 degrees where I live today. Spring in January? Fanfuckingtastic... |
| Guitar Legends 3 on the Wii | For giving me the best Christmas ever. |
| Grass | A relaxing color, feels great under the hand and smells beautiful after it rains |
| GMTV | For being so shit it actually makes me want to get out of bed and go to work. |
| Gordon Ramsay | For repeatedly refusing to get rid of the extremely foxy Bonnie on Hell's Kitchen despite the fact she can't boil an egg. I know he can be a cunt but he must get some kudos for this. |
| Global warming | Is this not a good thing? I don't even like skiing. |
| Graham Coxon | The most talented British artist ever, forget Albarn etc etc - Just listen to his albums and enjoy a wonderfully talented lyricist and guitarist at work. Saw him live at the Astoria, best.gig.ever!! |
| Galexy Chocolate | Fit bird eating chocolate, now that's an advert - Cadbury's take note. |
| German saunas | Where else can a single woman walk into a room full of aesthetically pleasing men, naked and proud (in more ways than one), and have them all bid you 'ein Schoen Guten Tag' as if it's the most normal thing in the world? |
| Gillian Anderson | A brilliant actress, and let's face it, the bitch is hot. |