| Only in action/horror films and the economy does "worst case scenario" mean "what exactly is actually going to happen."
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| When in the supermarket you will always spot some prick with a bluetooth headset in
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| Behind every beard is a man with a shit chin
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| When cheating on your wife or girlfriend - make sure that they both have the same length and colour hair so when one asks "who's hair is this?", you can simply say - "It's yours you balding twat".
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| Gary Glitter looks a little bit like a kiddy fiddler
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| If you are new to Holy Moly ignore the comments in 'responses'.
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| The mood board for hair and makeup on the female presenters of BBC olympic coverage is mainly composed of pictures of Judith Chalmers
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| The reason childbirth hurts so much is Karma for the time spent kicking boys in the knackers when you were 10 years old.
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| porn teaches us more than Christ did
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| All of the USA's problems can be atributted to the fact is it built on a Native American burial ground.
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| If one life partner is good enough for penguins then it should be good enough for people.
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| British athletes are really only any good at sailing, rowing and cycling.
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| No-One wants to be in Gary Glitter's gang any more
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| A wanks as good as the rest
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| The bigger the headphones the smaller the prick.
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| Never board a cross-channel ferry that doesn't smell of chips.
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| The human race is divided into 2 groups: those who can give a high-five without looking ridiculous, and those who cannot.
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| Russians only invade smaller nations during Olympic years. Hungary '56, Czechoslovakia '68, Afghanistan '80 as well as Georgia this year. So if we ignore the whinging of gaudy bauble loving,roid addicted fanatics & abolished all that Olympic shit, then the commy (oh yes they are) bastards would be well & truly fucked.
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| Poor children smell of biscuits
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| During a credit crunch, CashConverters is awash with footspas.
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