| When sat on the bog with your laptop you should know it's time to cut down the online poker
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| You will never see senior management in the toilet
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| We're all fucked.
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| There will not be a dance compilation album entitled "in the Mix" until 2026 , which is the next year that rhymes.
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| Everyone blames the monkey for failed Rules posts rather than their sense of humour being poor
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| You can always tell it's nearly *apparently* Christmas when all you see on television is adverts for pretty operatic boy bands. Or Mother's day.
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| there's always one teaspoon left after you've done the washing up
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| Elderly couples will normally wear beige anoraks. In summer this is replaced with the "light weight bomber style de-lux" also available in beige, and taupe.
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| Today's crisis shows our inability to save.
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| The more a person complains about the new look Facebook, the more empty and vacuous their lives actually are.
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| Alistar Darling looks like Danielle Radcliffe in 40 years.
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| Receptionists spend 65% of their day on facebook, 20% texting their friends, 10% on hotmail, 3% in the toilet and 2% answering the fucking phone.
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| There is no Holy Moly rule that is completely infallible.
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| At no point in this life do I want to speak to another man whilst I have my penis in my hand.
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| A person who is friends with someone in the public eye will manage to work that fact into the conversation within minutes of you meeting them, and then pretend that it isn't a big deal to them.
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| you should never own up to being the OP
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| Tuesday 'Sub of the Day' should be everyday in Subway.
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| For every person who recommends a film to his/her friends, there will always be someone else in the group who will disagree regardless of whether they have seen it or not.
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| No one is confused about car insurance
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| Turning it off and on again works for more then just computers.
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