1. KATE SEXINSANE
(Holy News / News)

KATE BECKINSALE SAYS SHE'S TOO GOOD IN BED TO BE A DECENT COOK

2. MILLS AND LOON
(Holy News / News)

NEW HEATHER MILLS CLAIMS IN C4 DOCUMENTARY

3. Joint Barclay & Oyster card
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

So now when my wallet gets nicked, not only can I not get any cash out, I also can't get myself home! What a fucking stupid idea!

4. That cunt of a ticket inspector!
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

For taking my Oyster card off me as I was travelling, because because your readers don't fucking read it properly, and then fining me £20. I just about make fucking ends-meet in this cunting

5. Transport For London
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

OK, we get the idea that you want people to use Oyster instead of paper tickets, but if that's the case don't shut your fucking ticket booth AND turn off your fucking Oyster machine when we've got no

6. Transys
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...nts who make Big Brother surveillance and warfare tech for the global war effort, yet market their cruddy Oyster card as a hippie lifestyle tool. Grow up you cunts who believe the hype, you may b...

7. Tube Station Barrier Cunts
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

You know the cunts - the ones who bury their Oyster Card under 4 tons of crap in their oversized fake Louis Vuitton bag, then hold up everyone else queueing behind them to get through the barrier whil

8. The laydeh HM poster
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

...sex kitten, dressed in black and employing the sophisticated gait of a Frenchwoman with a rabid taste for oysters. Your rich father who owns a condom factory would also think I'm fuckin' marvelous. ...

9. Few outside London know or care what an Oyster car...
(Glossary / Rules of Modern Life)

Few outside London know or care what an Oyster card or Routemaster is.

10. Get an Oyster card- you can enjoy the benefits of&...
(Glossary / Rules of Modern Life)

Get an Oyster card- you can enjoy the benefits of being financially raped by Transport For London cheap travel and be tracked by the government at the same time.