1. PRE PUBIC ENEMY
(Holy News / News)

FLAVOR FLAV CLAIMS HE LOST HIS VIRGINITY AGE SIX

2. CROP GUN
(Holy News / News)

TOM CRUISE WAS THE ORIGINAL CHOICE FOR 'EDWARD SCISSORHANDS'

3. WIN THREE BOOKS ON EAST ASIAN CINEMA BY DAVID CARTER
(Holy News / Competition)

THREE BOOKS ON EAST ASIAN CINEMA UP FOR GRABS

4. I'M IN A GLASS CASE OF EMOTION!
(Holy News / News)

ANCHORMAN TOPS POLL OF COMEDY FILMS

5. GWYN PUT A SMILE UPON YOUR FACE
(Holy News / News)

GWYNETH PALTROW AND CHRIS MARTIN MAY BE ADOPTING

6. THE LAW OF THE JUNGLE
(Holy News / News)

BRITNEY'S ENTOUARGE BEGIN TO TURN ON EACH OTHER

7. THE SISTERS GRIM
(Holy News / News)

SIENNA MILLER AND KATE MOSS ARE FRIENDS AGAIN

8. NO SHOW WINO
(Holy News / News)

AMY WINEHOUSE CANCELS ALL TOUR DATES THIS YEAR

9. WEAVE ME ALONE!
(Holy News / News)

MICHAEL JACKSON HAS THREE HOUR HAIRDO

10. Red, Red Whine
(Holy News / News)

Nicole Kidman was unhappy growing up with ginger hair

11. Are They (L)inked?
(Holy News / News)

Angelina Jolie is facing liver failure. Or just the tattooist

12. Travolta's Head In The Clouds Over Jett
(Holy News / News)

John Travolta's neighbour is taking the star to court accusing him and his wife of child abuse in th

13. Cameron Diaz is the Spottiest A-Lister – Official
(Holy News / News)

Cameron Diaz and chums compete to see who spray the most puss on a mirror from their spots

14. Bono
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

... for this quote; "A great volcano of a man who sang fire, but spilled over with a love of life in all its complexity...." A priceless cunt you are....

15. Digital Cameras
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

Tacky, over-complex, tempremantal satan-gadgets. If I can get the fucker to work long enough to take a fucking picture, it spends so long focusing, clicking, whirring and generally being a cunt that t

16. Employing Staff
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...the shitter or 10 minutes late back from lunch, there always some cunting thing going on at home with your complex bastard of a personal life, always fucking sick, always fucking moaning, your always ...

17. Gary Lineker
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

How come if it rains 152 days a year in Britain you have a constant orange glow to your complexion, solarium inhabiting ridiculous looking cunt! That advert is really starting to grate now as well

18. Lily in Cannes
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...minge hidden and behave yourself... unless you're a scummy cunt with a rich daddy and a vulgar entitlement complex! Lily Allen? Mini talent......

19. Scientology
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

Want to know if the man you're about to marry will turn out to be a fat, balding homosexual with a god complex? just check his wallet for a scientology membership card...

20. Scousers
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...'t want to see every detail of your forehead, don't scrape it back with such force. The Face: Your skin complexion is frankly poor. The choices of colour appear to be either snow white, yellow, or ...

21. Spam mail
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

For giving me a complex about my penis size. Cyber-stalking Cunts.

22. Spanish villa bloke
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...all know that would only buy a broom cupboard in the arse end of no where. Anyway I don't want to live in complex with a load of ageing Brits with skin like fucking leather. Shut your mouth you bald...

23. White Poppy wearers
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

No, you aren't making a stand against the industrial-military complex and war in general, you are just making yourself look like a self rightous twat who doesnt realise that the red poppy was chosen b

24. YouTube Beatbullying campaign
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...ebrities are not going to stop bullying by sitting on the screen whining about how bad bullying is. It's a complex issue and is not gonna get solved in one stupid week.. camera hungry cunts... ...

25. In Search of Lost Time
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

...secluded in a cork-lined room, writing the 3,500 page novel. A hyper-intellectual book consisting of long, complex sentences which digress at every opportunity, with drawn-out descriptions of minor de...

26. Usain Bolt
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

...ut mainly for the fact that he is a breath of fresh air in a sport dominated by twatish americans with god complexes. I still cannot believe what i saw in that final....

27. Calling your son Finnean Ruck does not give him th...
(Glossary / Rules of Modern Life)

...Finnean Ruck does not give him the best start in life, especially if he is born with a wonky eye and a bad complexion....

28. BORING AS FUCK TERMS AND CONDITIONS
(Static Content)

...ou also agree to NEVER use another person's account for any reason. We also HIGHLY recommend you use a complex and unique password for your account, to prevent account theft. On submitting c...