1. JODIE MARSH SUFFERS AN ATTACK OF THE HEATHER MILLS
(Holy News / News)

JODIE MARSH NOT TELLING TRUTH ABOUT CHARITY?

2. THE SIMPSON STRIFE
(Holy News / News)

ASHLEE SIMPSON BLAMES SLURRING ON 'BAD VIBES'

3. DUDE, WHERE'S THAT BAR?
(Holy News / News)

ASHTON KUTCHER'S PARTY MAY HAVE INFECTED THE 'A' LIST

4. THE ACCOLADE HUNTER
(Holy News / News)

DEAD AUSTRALIAN STEVE IRWIN MADE A PROFESSOR

5. CRIME IS A LOSING GAME
(Holy News / News)

BLAKE FIELDER-CIVIL ARRESTED ON SUSPICION OF PEVERTING JUSTICE

6. Graham Sankey
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...ird world country like Bulgaria. You fucking twat. I hope they cut your beefy head off and mail it to the barman!...

7. Mel Gibson
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...ink tossers would drink. I'll have an Apocolypto on the rocks please. NO!!! I'll have a rock please barman so I can smash it into Mel Gibsons cunt-like brain. A cunt who makes films for cunts...

8. Those Two Sisters I met in Bucharest
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

For expanding my mind that night in my hotel. Also,to the barman for introducing us. Excellent!!

9. When a barman / woman drops and smashes a glass, s...
(Glossary / Rules of Modern Life)

When a barman / woman drops and smashes a glass, someone will shout "sack the juggler".