1. IT DISNEY LOOK GOOD
(Holy News / News)

MILEY CYRUS OFFERED CONDOM CONTRACT

2. HUGH PERVERT
(Holy News / News)

MILEY CYRUS OFFERED TO POSE NAKED FOR PLAYBOY AT 18

3. WILEY MILEY
(Holy News / News)

MILEY CYRUS APOLOGISES TO HER FANS AFTER TOPLESS SHOOT

4. FRESH CANNON FODDER
(Holy News / News)

MILEY CYRUS REPLACES BRITNEY AS THE BIGGEST PAPARAZZI DRAW

5. One Love (And Hate)
(Holy News / News)

BBC launches series of shows to celebrate 40th birthday of Radio 1

6. How To Win Parts And Influence People
(Holy News / News)

Oliver Stone impressed by Colin Farrell's boozing

7. Preachy girls at work
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

Fuck off back to Catholic school. Sanctimonious cunts. Either that or wait for me in the disabled toilet with your skirt up and pants down.