1. NEWSMOUND
(Holy News / News)

WHAT'S GOING ON ELSEWHERE ON THE INTERNET?

2. ALFIE BIN LADEN
(Holy News / News)

MICHAEL CAINE DETAINED AT US AIRPORT AS TERROR SUSPECT

3. SCHOOLGIRL ERROR
(Holy News / News)

NAOMI CAMPBELL'S AGENT GIVES BAD EXCUSES FOR 'DRUNKENESS'

4. SCHOOLBOY ERROR
(Holy News / News)

CHUCK NORRIS TARGETTED FOR DEATH BY TWO SCHOOLBOYS

5. CARCRASH-A-BLANCA
(Holy News / News)

MADONNA TO REMAKE 'CASABLANCA' AND STAR IN THE LEAD ROLE

6. NEWSMOUND
(Holy News / News)

WHAT'S GOING ON ELSEWHERE ON THE INTERNET?

7. NEWSMOUND
(Holy News / News)

WHAT'S GOING ON ELSEWHERE ON THE INTERNET?

8. THE LADY IN BLACK
(Holy News / News)

CHRIS DE BURGH TO PLAY CONCERT IN IRAN

9. GOSH! ONE DID IT AGAIN!
(Holy News / News)

BRITNEY SPEARS IS OFFERED ADVICE BY THE DUCHESS OF YORK

10. War Babies
(Holy News / News)

Angelina and Brad play war to celebrate son's birthday

11. Obligatory Youtube Clip
(Holy News / News)

Worried about the Spice Girls going to Iraq? Mel C can handle herself

12. Send The Spice Girls To Baghdad
(Holy News / News)

Vote to send the Spice Girls to Iraq on their world tour

13. Keeping Up For The Jones
(Holy News / News)

Catherine Zeta Jones wants more children. Michael Douglas not sure

14. Oops I Did It... Oh, Fuck It
(Holy News / News)

Britney flashes her nipple 'by accident' - Again

15. Houston, I Have A Problem
(Holy News / News)

Bobby Brown - Still scared of Osama Bin Laden

16. War is Stupid, and Ozzy Is Too
(Holy News / News)

Ozzy Osbourne says war is bad, probably

17. Bravo, Too Ginger
(Holy News / News)

Prince Harry begins training for mountainous desert war in Canada

18. A Tramp In The BB Line Up? Surely Not!
(Holy News / News)

Glamour Model Lucy James Set for Big Brother?

19. Dirty Harry in 'The Dead Boring'
(Holy News)

Prince Harry's life story is to be turned into an action film

20. The Cat Who Got The Cream
(Holy News / News)

George Galloway to replace Russell Brand on 'Big Brother's Big Mouth'

21. Apprentice World Exclusive!
(Holy News / News)

The contestants for the new series of The Apprentice have been announced

22. Apprentice World Exclusive!
(Holy News / News)

contestants named in BBC's The Apprentice

23. Cunt meets grunt
(Holy News / News)

Michael Jackson visits troops at an Army base in Japan

24. Cunt meets grunt
(Holy News / News)

Jackson on US military base

25. 'Troops in Iraq' poster
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

Fine, the troops might moan when they haven't been issued with the body armour they were promised but understandable considering they''re being shot at. I suspect you, however are the type of person t

26. Alastair Campbell
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

For David Kelly, for Bliar, for Iraq and being able to play the bagpipes. And calling his son Rory.

27. George Bush
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

... political majority in the most powerful country in the world. You picked a fight with a governmentless Iraq, lunatics''r''us North Korea and billy no mates Iran. You lost to all fucking three of them...

28. Have Your Say on the BBC website
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...u're entitled to ''have your say'' on the day''s hottest current events like "Should Ginger Harry go to Iraq?", "Did you queue up all night for Slapper Moss''s fuckawful tat?" "Did the earth move for ...

29. Iraqi executioners
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...how to make these things properly and neatly? Short-drop, black-masked, camera-toting, Saddam-taunting Iraqi cunts...

30. John Bolton (US ambassador to the UN)
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...s of having 'extreme left wing' views and being a 'superior Brit' simply for asking him questions about Iraq. What a stupid, stupid cunt....