1. THE EDGE OF REASON
(Holy News / News)

BONO COMPARES THE EDGE TO VINCENT VAN GOGH

2. OUT, DAMNED CLOT!
(Holy News / News)

IRISH THEATRE COMPANY PLAN A BECKHAM MUSICAL

3. PLEASE PUT IT AWAY, LOVE
(Holy News / News)

MICHELLE HEATON IN HER BRA FOR UNKNOWN REASON

4. 'I WANT IT' TO STOP AND GO AWAY
(Holy News / News)

CHANELLE HAYES PERFORMS SINGLE AT SHOPPING CENTRE

5. GOOD LEGS GONE BAD
(Holy News / News)

RIHANNA SAYS SHE DOESN'T LIKE HER LEGS

6. I DON'T LIKE PUN-DAYS
(Holy News / News)

BOB GELDOF BACKS IRISH TURKEY FOR EUROVISION

7. THE GIFT OF THE BLAH-BLAH-BLAH-NEY
(Holy News / News)

JAMES BLUNT IS CONSIDERING RETIREMENT IN IRELAND

8. STUCK IN A MOMENT
(Holy News / News)

JADE GOODY DOESN'T RECOGNISE BONO

9. DARK SATANIC MILLS
(Holy News / News)

HEATHER MILLS MADE PARIS HILTON CRY OVER ANIMAL ABUSE

10. TWO PREMIERE TICKETS FOR SHROOMS UP FOR GRABS
(Holy News / Competition)

WIN TWO TICKETS FOR THE DUBLIN PREMIERE OF SHROOMS

11. WHO LIVES IN A HOUSE LIKE THIS?
(Holy News / News)

LOUIS WALSH DISHES THE DIRT ON HIS FAKE X-FACTOR HOUSE

12. PLOT WORTH IT
(Holy News / News)

PLAN TO KIDNAP BONO'S DAUGHTER ABANDONED

13. EYESORE WILL FOLLOW
(Holy News / News)

BONO IS DETERMINED TO RUIN THE DUBLIN SKYLINE

14. TWIN TOWN
(Holy News / News)

SIENNA MILLER AND RHYS IFANS GET MATCHING TATTOOS

15. 24-HOUR POWDER PEOPLE
(Holy News / News)

HAPPY MONDAYS' BEZ CAUGHT WITH A NOSEFUL OF POWDER

16. Bono Gets His Knighthood
(Holy News / News)

Bono recieves honorary knighthood in Dublin. The U2 singer can not use the epithet 'Sir'; and sugges

17. Bono gets his knighthood
(Holy News / News)

Bono gets honorary knighthood

18. Climate change protesters at Heathrow
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

20 of them flew in from Dublin.

19. Dublin Zoo
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

As I was paying I excitedly read the brochure - we have lions, elephants, rhinos.... The holy trinity of African land mammals.... ...had been transported to fucking Rotterdam to assist with thei

20. Samantha Mumba
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...l you were pretty crap at that too. So what to do? Well why not play a "come back" gig in a tiny venue in Dublin. Pity then that only 30 people bought tickets and you had to cancel it. Fuck off and...

21. Sienna Miller
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...a subject you know 1/5 of fuck all about. You're an actress. And not a very good one. If I want to fly to dublin for a weekend, i'll fuckin do it. You self obsessed, self-promoting, self-absorbed cunt...

22. The Trinity Ball in Dublin
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...g I wasn't really up for doing as I'd have to watch the footage back endless times). Otherwise well done Dublin for a nice evening and it's a shame to be leaving....

23. Tim Burton
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

...pting for pale wierd folks who all die at the end. And looks like Robert Smith after a hard weekend in Dublin...

24. U2
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

They are building a tower on the docks on Dublin, for now lets call it Cunt Towers, as a 'legacy' to their greatness. We don't want you, your music, your hotel, your tour, your clothing line or your

25. Indian food
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

...de the music sound even beter. in an era of overpriced mediocre food and pretentious shit ruining many of Dublin's beter spots for a night out, indian food still delivers, i for one will be quite happ...

26. The Irish
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

For having a kebab shop in Dublin called Abrakebabra and for taking fucking great big musical instruments to the pub with them, just for the ''craic''. Youse are fucking great, so you are.

27. No one has ever drank a half-pint in Dublin...
(Glossary / Rules of Modern Life)

No one has ever drank a half-pint in Dublin