1. NEW YORK STATE
(Holy News / News)

HEATHER MILLS BUYS APARTMENT IN NEW YORK

2. SNOOP IN THE DOGG HOUSE
(Holy News / News)

OPRAH WINFREY CALLS SNOOP DOGG A MISOGYNIST

3. CK 'FUN'
(Holy News / News)

FERGIE TO BECOME SPOKESPERSON FOR CALVIN KLEIN

4. WHO WON'T LET THE DOGG IN?
(Holy News / News)

SNOOP DOGG CELEBRATES VISA WIN ON US TELEVISION

5. WIN BESTIVAL TICKETS AND A SAMSUNG P2 MP4 PLAYER
(Holy News / Competition)

Win a pair of Bestival tickets, a Samsung MP4 player and Bestival CDs

6. The Crappy, Crappy Sound of Radio One
(Holy News / News)

Full tracklisting for the 40 years of Radio One album revealed

7. A DOG IN KNICKERS?
(Holy News / News)

London paper desparate for Billie Piper stories

8. A DOG IN KNICKERS?
(Holy News / News)

London Lite display some truly shocking journalism (unlike us!)

9. Calvin Haris' Album
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

Save money on buying/downloading this album by going to a car boot sale, Buying a really old games console (game boy or similar) and simply listen to the backing music from the games.

10. Calvin Harris
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

No Calvin. You did NOT invent disco. And you are NOT the hottest thing at the moment. No matter what Radio One say. Because lets all be honest, Radio one do over hype things. And you're one of them.

11. Calvin Harris
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

It was acceptable in the 80's.

12. Baggage Handlers
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

Lost the new Calvin Harris album and got Naomi Campbell arrested; all they need to do now is lose Heather Mills' spare leg for the triple whammy.

13. Calvin and Hobbes
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

For being the coolest little 4 year old in the World. Also, my son looks like him, so he is definetly sacred! Hobbes - some of the most profound remarks from stuffed toy. Class!