1. NEWSMOUND
(Holy News / News)

WHAT'S GOING ON ELSEWHERE ON THE INTERNET?

2. Brendan Cole
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

I'll leave it to the bored, response-cunts to sort this one out

3. Mike Hedges (Music Producer)
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

For refusing to work with Singer-Songwriter Brendan Benson. Based on the grounds they'd be called Benson & Hedges.

4. New 'The Mummy' Movie
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

Rachel Weisz has been replaced. REPLACED! The lesbian in me is FURIOUS! Fucking wankers! Brendan Fraser needed the work though, he was getting too fat.

5. You will never meet someone called Brendan who isn...
(Glossary / Rules of Modern Life)

You will never meet someone called Brendan who isnt a cunt.