1. THE AMBASSADOR'S PARTY
(Holy News / News)

RUSSELL BRAND EXPLAINS NIGHT AT EMBASSY CLUB

2. Newsmound
(Holy News / News)

What's happening elsewhere on the internet?

3. ALLOW US THE INDULGENCE FOR A SECOND
(Holy News / News)

holy moly blows its own trumpet

4. Arsenal FC
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

Flukey Fudge Packing Cunts

5. Ashley Cole
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

Bet you wish you'd stayed at Arsenal now you money grabbing cunt

6. Laurie Sanchez
(Glossary / Cunts Corner)

For misuse of the word ''literally''. I quote ''We ground arsenal down, literally'' I don''t think you did, stupid cunt!

7. Clive Tyldesley
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

For saying during last nights Arsenal-Juve match: 'And that's a bit too high from Mutu. Oh. That's probably a poor choice of phrase'. Give the man a knighthood.

8. Losing at football
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

For distracting my boyfriend from the fact that I have written his car off. My regards to Arsenal.

9. The Portsmouth vs Arsenal commentator
(Glossary / Sacred Cows)

For saying, "Ashley Cole's coming in for a fair bit of stick this afternoon, but you've got to expect that when you play away from home".