| You'll find more wit on the back of phonebox porn flyer than you would in the HM comments.
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| Instructions on a toilet handryer are unneccesary!
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| If you still dream of being the girlfriend of a celebrity after your 26th birthday you are officially a fuck nugget.
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| Kerry Katona has single handedly brought down the whole Iceland banking system
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| Chewing gum with your mouth open makes you look stupid.
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| The nutter always decides to sit next to you on the bus
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| everyone got a kerplunk for christmas in the 70s
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| On a positive note, the credit crunch and recession will say goodbye to FairTrade products and ethically sourced goods
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| a man will always think he has gotten away with having a quick look at your tits
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| Pete Doherty bears a startling resemblence to Tweety Pie. In fact, if his face were the same colour as his teeth, most people would believe he really IS Tweety Pie.
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| The best way to avoid the credit crunch is steal
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| The men collecting bog tax in club lavatories for soap and towels will be one of the first hit by the credit crunch.
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| When sat on the bog with your laptop you should know it's time to cut down the online poker
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| You will never see senior management in the toilet
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| We're all fucked.
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| There will not be a dance compilation album entitled "in the Mix" until 2026 , which is the next year that rhymes.
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| Everyone blames the monkey for failed Rules posts rather than their sense of humour being poor
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| You can always tell it's nearly *apparently* Christmas when all you see on television is adverts for pretty operatic boy bands. Or Mother's day.
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| there's always one teaspoon left after you've done the washing up
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| Elderly couples will normally wear beige anoraks. In summer this is replaced with the "light weight bomber style de-lux" also available in beige, and taupe.
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